Wednesday, January 11, 2017

Week 8

Well, here I am at 8 weeks since VSG surgery.  Technically, it's not quite 2 months, so maybe I will do another update on that day.  It wouldn't hurt me to update here more often anyway.  As of today I weight 207.4.  My weight on the day of surgery was 247, so that makes a total loss of 39.6 lbs.  My BMI at surgery was 41.1 and today it is 34.5.  Pretty good progress!

I mostly out of my bluesy slump from Monday, but it comes and goes.  Last evening was a bit rough because the weather is pretty depressing around here.  We had a dump load of snow and sub zero temperatures, then the temp jumped up about 40 degrees, brought rain along with it and all the melt off is a big flooding, slushy mess.  The end of my driveway is a swimming pool.  I tried to shovel out a trench to a drainage grate, but after an hour of that and my boots full of icy water for the umpteenth time, I admitted defeat.  I was so tired too.  I made some soup and then crawled into bed, under my electric blanket and fell asleep almost immediately.

Yesterday was also the anniversary of the death of my sweet momma.  That brought back all kinds of bittersweet memories and the wish that I could just talk to her again.  Or at least be able to tell her that I love her and miss her and the changes I have made.  I know she'd approve.  She was my reason for getting this surgery and going through what I have been going through.  All the complications that arose from her type 2 diabetes are what ultimately took her life.  I saw myself headed down that same path with my health problems, obesity and lack of ability to improve things on my own.  I needed a tool to get me there.  Weight loss surgery has definitely proven to be an effective tool so far.

Do I have any regrets?  I wouldn't say that I have felt anything like regret so far.  I have come close a couple times but only for the awkwardness of occasions like eating out.  My husband enjoys that so much and his favorite place is a buffet type of meal or an expensive steak.  I can't even begin to do more than a couple bites any place he takes me and I feel like I am such a waste of money buying a full meal.  He says it doesn't matter, I'm worth it.  But, I also look around at all the piled high plates at all the tables and people tucking into huge mouthfuls and really enjoying themselves.  I am certainly not envious, because to be honest, I don't want to be like that, but it just makes me feel so conspicuous when I ask the waitress to bring me a box to take my food home in.  Of course, if it's a buffet place, I don't even get the left overs, as they don't allow the take away box.

There is nothing bad in all of this, it's just so different.

But anyway...39.6 lbs lost in 8 weeks!  Awesome!

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