It's been quite some time since I have updated here at my blog. Time just goes by so fast now and I realize I am only about 4 weeks away from my 1 year since surgery. What a year!! So many blessings.
The last 3 or 4 months I have not been as successful as I would like to have been, and there were some pounds creeping back on in the last month or 2. I had got my weight down to around 165 and then the next thing I know, this past Monday, I am at 183! That was fairly devastating to me. But, I know what causes that and it's my inattention to what I am eating, the frequency in which I am eating and the portion size. Basically, every single other reason I had prior to my surgery that would cause me to gain weight as opposed to lose weight. Or even maintain weight!
As of this morning, after paying attention to this for this week, I am gratefully down to 179.6. Whew. I still would like to be closer to 155 pounds and maintain between 155 and 160. I have decided this would be a good place for this 54 year old body. Any way I look at it...I am so much closer than I ever was at 250 pounds!
In the past few months I participated in a 5K. It's not like I ran it, but even participating is more than I would have ever done in the past. I also have continued to do lots of walking and in general am much more physical than I ever was before and am able to do it without difficulty. My son visited for a few weeks from Hawaii, and he ahd I went on a trip to the Oregon coast. We stayed at a fun little bungalow on the beach and walked every day on the beach for miles and miles. It was so wonderful to spend that time with him and have the stamina to do all of the activities that we did.
Another monumental accomplishment was my visit with my primary care physician. She did my blood work and officially stated that I am no longer diabetic and all my previous conditions are resolved. She actually does not even need to see me for another YEAR as opposed to 3 months as I have been doing with her for the last 10 years. It's amazing!!
My main struggles now are more mental. I listen to the cravings much more than I need to and find myself snacking too often just because it's there. And these snack foods are my downfall because I can eat them frequently, without feeling too full and am taking in too many calories than I should be. Plus, the type of foods they are turn to carbs I don't need to have. I think my main downfall lately has been popcorn. It's not a bad snack in general, but I can eat it rather mindlessly and a lot of it. I recently bought a great big bag of skinny pop from Costco and was afraid to open it all week because I know me well enough to know it would be a constant dive into the bag. But, I did portion it out into individual servings and now those are there and ready and when the bag is empty I am done. Makes common sense. And yet, things that are simple sometimes are harder when the brain is involved.
The other struggle I have, also mental, is my perseption of myself physically. I forget how far along I have come and don't give myself credit for the accomplishments and instead dwell on that 10-15 pound gain. It's not fair. As soon as I give into that thinking all I am is "fat" and unworthy and etc and so on. Stupid mind games. I've done them my whole life. The surgery definitely did not fix my brain! I am healthier, I feel better, I look better. As I said earlier....so many blessings!
