Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Week 28 Post Op

I haven't been very good about updating here although I do think about it often. I know that I will wish that I had down the road.   So many changes have occurred in the past 28 weeks.  The other day my husband and I stopped by the grocery store to pick up a few items and on the way in I saw a girl that used to be on my team at work (I was her boss) and when I greeted her, she honestly didn't recognize me.  I had to actually tell her who I was.  It was a little embarrassing to be honest, but once she realized it was me, she grabbed me and hugged me.  Her expression was either total shock or astonishment.  I have to keep asking myself if it can truly be that I have changed that much?  It doesn't seem like it's possible that I would be that much changed.

I had a pretty rough week, however, despite these kind of experiences.  My eating has been out of control and actually rather like bingeing.  Jim was home for the week, so we ate out a few times and he had a lot of snack foods that I helped myself to.  I have discovered that my pouch doesn't seem to have any issue with M&M's as well as a donut or other miscellaneous bad for me items.  If I factor in a stress-filled week at work, well...you get the picture.  I have GOT TO buckle down this week and take better care of myself.  If it weren't for the fact that I have tried to keep up with all my exercise I would have gained a lot more than the .4 lbs that I have to report.  But, still, I am down to 170.4 from 247 since surgery. It's significant!

This morning I got on the treadmill and made it count!  I ran for about 20 minutes all total, but did cardio for about 47 minutes total.  I am determined to make ground this week and improve on my habits.  When "normal" people have a few days of bad eating and not exercising, they don't usually give up and keep up that same behavior.  I am trying very hard to be like this because the old Shelley would say she is doomed and continue on along that same path until all the weight is back.  Plus some more.  I made a picture collage this morning and it's really quite astounding to me.  This is me at quite likely my highest weight ever.  It was the day of my 1st son's wedding.  What a time to look and feel your worst.  To give myself some credit, I had been going through some very low and depressing times in my life and I am sure these were contributors to my weight gain, but be that as it may, I am in all of my sons photos looking this way.  The side by side photo is this past weekend.  Quite a transformation!

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Week 25 Post Op

Week 25!  I can't believe it has been almost 6 months since I had my surgery.  It's been an amazing journey.  If I were reading this blog, I would want to know about the stats, so here they are.  My all time highest weight was a couple years ago at 277 lbs.  I would have to look up the exact date, and I don't even know if this was my highest weight, but it was one that was recorded.  I started this journey (as well as this blog) nearly a year ago, in June of 2016.  You can read all about that process on other posts, but in the end I had my surgery on November 15, 2016, with a starting weight of 247 lbs.  For week 25, I weighed in at 172.8.  That's a loss since surgery, of 74.2 lbs and a total loss from my highest recorded weight, of 104.2 lbs!  WOW!

What does all of this mean in the big scheme of things?  It means I am very close to be done with this part of the process.  My surgeon never gave me a goal weight to achieve, but I do meet with his office next week, so I am going to ask those questions to see when I should slow this rodeo down and start the whole maintenance process.  My guess is, they will want me to lose another 20 pounds, but maybe not?

I am wearing (comfortably) a size 8-10 in pants.  For shirts I am still at a large, although sometimes a medium works out fine.  As a comparison, I started out wearing a size 18-20 pants and 22-24 blouses.  And all of this is only in 6 months!

What is it like to lose this much weight, this fast?  Well, for starters, it's pretty amazing.  I feel amazed quite frequently at many, many aspects of being a smaller more normal sized woman.  My brain hasn't really caught up to the excitement of it all, however, so sometimes I don't "get" the comments made by others on how small I look.  Or comments such as, "You have to be about done losing weight now?!".  I still, for the most part, feel like the same person inside with the same insecurities and want to scoff at the compliments.  I am trying really hard to be gracious though, and accept them. 
Here is a list of positives:
  • I can run!  I completed the couch 25K and finished off running for 35 minutes straight.  whew!
  • I can walk up and down stairs all day!  I went up and down my stairs the other day just doing routine chores.  35 flights.  I didn't experience anything negative afterwards. No sore muscles, no joint pain.  Just normal stuff.
  • I can eat pretty much anything now, albeit a much smaller portion.  I am still trying to focus on protein first.  It fills me up the fastest and is better for me.
  • My diabetes seems to be gone or nearly gone!  I haven't checked my blood sugar regularly, but did the last 2 mornings.  103!  That's amazing!  I see my pcp next month so she will check my A1C again and we will see where I am.
  • I feel generally happier.  I still have bouts of anxiety at times and stress but these are usually unrelated to how I feel about my physcial appearance and health in general.
There have been a few negatives too...
I am going bald.  I have probably lost more hair than I still have.  It's terribly embarrasing and has brought on an anxiety that I had never experienced before.  I am working on solutions to this and hope and pray that all the experts are right and this is just a temporary situation.  I have found some little stray baby hairs, so am hopeful it will grow back even better than before.  Hope...hope....

So, that's my update!  Pictures to follow soon!