Monday, November 21, 2016

Sunday night-Monday morning

Dates are running together and sleep is often very elusive for me, especially at night time. I tried going to bed upstairs in my own bed with my husband last night but only made it until midnight before I had to take my painful body back down to our oversized armchair. It's unfortunate, but my abdomen muscles and incisions were hurting so badly and laying on my side was out of the question. I will try again tonight though.

I have stopped taking the pain pills almost completely. I did have 2 of them yesterday, but considering I was taking 2 every 4 hours only having 1 -2 times in 24 hours is a big step. I was going to run out of them anyway and wanted to see what I could handle. I do still have some gas rumbling around in me and I am not sure if it is residual from the surgery or just intestinal from the liquid diet I am on. I have started taking stool softeners though because other than the aforementioned gas, I've had no bowel movements in 6 days. I also have not had a significant weight loss since surgery either but the issues just mentioned probably have a lot to do with that. I haven't been very worried about that'll come. 

My husband reminded me that I have not had any solid food in my stomach since last Sunday. I don't believe I have ever, in my lifetime, not eaten anything for 7 straight days. Of course,since I am on a liquid diet, I really have a couple more weeks of this to go through. I was watching a movie a few hours ago and a woman was eating a crunchy apple. I had the normal reaction of thinking that an apple sounded really good...and then reality slammed into my head that I CAN'T eat an apple.  It was a very weird moment. I also discovered that I am not immune to the idea of food. Yesterday I was watching food videos and even a quick trip with my husband to Walmart revealed that visually I still want food. My husband picked up a rotisserie chicken for his dinner. When we got home from the store and I opened the grocery bag,the smells wafting up into my face were so intense and rich and really overpowering. It smelled wonderful. Of course, later that day when I opened the fridge to get out my protein drink, the chicken was there and it smelled much less appealing and really offensive. I must make sure that Trey finishes that chicken off today. 

So my days now consist of, checking blood sugar in the morning.  If the numbers are 120 or higher, I am to take 10 units of lantus insulin. If they are 150 or higher, then I also take regular insulin based on a sliding scale. So far, I have only had to take 2 units at a time of the regular insulin. My fasting blood sugar yesterday morning was 138!! I honestly have not seen a number like that in a couple years at least. The doctor thinks the diabetes will go away. It is possible I will always need to monitor it now to make certain I am not over those 120 or even 150 numbers. I am not sure how that will work itself out. I also never had to give myself insulin until now because I was treating my diabetes with pills. I have learned that the process is not as daunting as I once thought.

As for food...I am required to drink 4 protein shakes a day. I was using the inspire powdered protein but after a couple days of dealing with blender bottles,  clumps and foamy drinks, I admitted defeat and my husband took me to buy some of the premier protein. It's already pre-measured and I know that 1 container is 2 shakes. I can deal with it. It simplified my process and eliminated some of the dread. So far, I don't mind the way it tastes. Probably what I do mind about "food" in this stage is that almost everything is sweet. Protein shakes, jello, popsicles, G2, crystal light...I miss savory! I was never one to treat myself overly much with desserts or sweet treats, and always preferred meat or breads or something like that.  I was actually rather shocked to discover how much I enjoy and even look forward to a cup of hot chicken broth. So nice and salty.  Pre-op, I was actually dreading that I would need to drink the broth. Now, I believe it's my favorite part!  Today, I am going to step outside of the box and blend up some canned soup I bought. I am nervous about it, to be truthful. But my diet did say I could try a bean or lentil soup. I can also have a cream soup. I just have to make certain it's completely blended.

I have started a very weird habit. I get these little gasps of air, perhaps they are yawns or just sudden intakes of breath, and I immediately stifle them with a little suck in of breath. It's not even conscious, until after I realize I just did it. It's super strange. I think I am trying to protect my new little tummy from any pain or expansion?   I also find it very odd that I will sip on some liquid and it seems to go down just fine, and then a few minutes later, I get a very tight and uncomfortable pressure that stretches across from shoulder to shoulder. I have to hold my breath for a few seconds until it passes. It's no wonder it's such a struggle to get in all the liquid I need in a day.

Well, this is pretty fair recap of my journey so far. Today, Jim heads back to SLC for work and may be gone for a couple days. Trey is home with me though, and I am going to put him to work this morning. This house is a wreck and I am tired of seeing it this way. I shall sit on the couch and supervise him. He'll love it!

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