It feels like spring is truly just around the corner. I actually went outside over the weekend, put in my earbuds and listened to music and walked and walked. It was great. You wouldn't think a walk would be a big deal...but this chick has been housebound for a YEAR. I went out only in limited doses, like to a grocery store, nothing else. And my body responded like it had been sitting in an office chair for a year. Sore legs and aching hips. I don't care...I feel that energy coming back and the desire to do it again. Somehow I need to shed the pajama clothes and make myself get out there. Plus, the dogs really like the walk too.
Depression. It's a real partner in my life. I did notice though some happy feelings accompanied with the exercise and music combination. I have started to really enjoy the Korean band, BTS. I am this "old" lady in Boise, but love this music from these 20 something year old guys. They have energy, a happy energy and it's really contagious to me. The music is awesome too...and good for a walk with the volume cranked up in my earbuds. I can't understand most of what they are singing/rapping, but it makes me smile, and I have needed something to smile about lately. Plus their dance moves are amazing. I haven't been a boy band fan since I was a teenager in the 70's. But it can be my secret. It's not like I can talk to anyone about this. It's not hurting anyone that I am a secret "army" member.
On Monday I had a shocking 198 lb weigh in. Surprised me because I woke up feeling kind of bloated. I sure did like the surprise of that! Of course this morning I was back to the 200 mark. Grrrr....not too much of a big deal though. I've been taking the increases and decreases as they come for about 4 months now and overall it's been a downward trend, and that's what counts. I have really been trying to work on the all or nothing attitude that plays with my mind all my life. Just keep pushing forward and try, try again. Plus, I can look forward to those planned out "going off program" weekends where it's fine to indulge. Then back on again. I have not planned the next date though...and I really should do that soon. Not take it soon, just plan when it will be so it's more meaningful.
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